Why you should cut your hair short once in your life

I always was the one experimenting with my hair from the age of 14-15. My mom was never one to say no to any color I wanted to try or hairstyle I wanted to do. But rather than feeling that it’s a daunting task to do I always have embraced change, and always lived life on the edge (if you could say) of hairstyles and colors. If you have not ever had a big chop or tried to go for an androgynous look once in your life, I am here to inspire you! Here are a few reasons why you should chop your locks off once in your life. Whether a buzz cut or a short pixie.

Change your whole look in under and hour!

If you’re looking to drastically change your look for probably under R300, depending on your stylist fees. This is the best option in the market. Walk in the old you, walk out the new you!

Liberating!

This year was the second time around I chopped my hair right down to around 5cm and gosh I felt amazing! To wake up to soft untouched damaged hair, was amazing. I never felt so alive. I hid behind my hair in most ways as society sometimes makes as though a woman’s beauty falls into her hair, but hell what is the saying “don’t judge a book by its cover”, should you not judge a woman by her inner beauty too. Strong woman are not made by their hair and but more how they live their lives inspiring other woman too and leaving a legacy.

It is very healthy

Don’t forget once you chop off the locks. You are left with the most healthy and undamaged hair you probably have not had in years. I can vouch my hair is at its healthiest and amazingly enough I can actually see the natural color and texture of my hair that I never even knew I had. Shocking.

Versatility

With shorter hair you can also change up your hair more often, in terms of color and styling. All take less time to do and to possibly undo. Lol.

Hair grows back

Let’s be honest hair grows back so don’t be in a panic. Hair is hair – only hair. Live a little! I have already done it twice!

The bubble life – COVID19 – Anonymous share

This anonymous story has been shared with the blog and is a personal view from a father, his thoughts on the pandemic Covid19 and what challenges he faced during the time.

Remember all entries are welcome and we love to hear from anyone who is willing to share their thoughts and views on any topic that could be related to the world and what is going on in their lives. Comment below if you have any thoughts on this.


The simplistic talk of a normal person, a father, a husband, a son, and brother. I talk basic and simple language basic English, and I feel like I normally say what I feel or think. Might come across as brass but I feel voice your opinion, and you shall be heard. Something I teach my kids who now live in a world that is nearly abnormal.

COVID – 19, The stylish virus of the year 2020. A pandemic that has affected the world Globally. A “UFO” something I would have called this thing we all know as Coronavirus “COVID – 19”. Think of the Versace or Armani of viruses, why I say this is when you see people wearing masks with real fashion statements, but do not research the actual protection levels if we look cool.

Have you sat and thought why they called it COVID – 19? Who came up with this name for this type of strain of the Coronavirus? I sit and think about this all the time, given all the time I have on my hands, especially now in a shutdown. After some research and deep diving luckily for the internet I found this:

“The “corona” in “coronavirus” actually comes from what the virus looks like.


“Under a microscope, the virus has these little proteins that sticks out of it and it kind of looks like the sun, the corona,” said Dr. Patel.

The novel coronavirus is the name of the virus.

“The disease it causes is called COVID-19. ‘CO’ corona, ‘V-I’ virus, ‘D’ disease, ’19,’ 2019,” said Dr. Patel.”

coronavirus under microscope

Abbreviated above by a qualified physician. Article used from google.

Routine? Really?

I stay in Sunny South Africa in Johannesburg. A beautiful country where the sunshine is continuously blazing, Mother Earth gives us all an optical illusion of warmth and comfort, the distinct feeling of being in Africa but Johannesburg disguising itself as some European city with the real darkness that comes along with the entire package.

Trying to remain with some sort of routine to work remotely and juggle between my business, and finding a way to allow all my staff to have jobs when trade was allowed to resume, as were shut completely, doors closed.

Trying to be innovative in my business so all the family’s in my company are kept safe and fed and have roofs over their heads during these testing times, doing zoom lessons for my kids schooling. Feeling like we automatically became teachers to them for education and not just life. A first of its kind? Majority or nearly all being done by my wife. Hats off to her.

Normal

Normally a bustling City of Johannesburg, with endless traffic that starts at 6 am and ends at 8 pm but never stops, she only gets quiet, in a normal time. In a normal World.

How amazing it is to use the word “NORMAL”. It seems so long ago when things were “NORMAL”, is that even the correct word to use in the times before COVID-19.

It just seems so long ago when your main concern for tomorrow was the headache of traffic in the morning, school runs, on the way to work, that routine “day in day out.”

As the Father of my children needing to know what their schedules were like for school and worrying about my son making the cricket team and the soccer team for his school, interested in listening to my daughter talk about her day and her very trivial 8 year old girl quarrels of Barbies and Pocket Polly.

WOW was that normal?

Was that Life?

Was that routine?

Was it Real or just a “bubble,” humans programmed by A.I as a robot is programmed, only our updates of Apps and Ram and Memory happen when were relaxed and doing what we enjoy the most, for some, it`s watching tv, playing games, doing outdoor activities, concentrating on your health and fitness called the recharge.

For most the daily importance was how we look on a day to day basis. Cosmetics make up for the Ladies, clothes with huge account debts to Edgars and Woolworths, our closets getting fuller by the day, we were relentless as humans. All we did or still do, and most likely will continue to do given Normality returns to the old World. Do we best at suck the world dry, for money and greed and the status that comes with it, the luxury of materialistic stuff, cars, houses the biggest TV, and all the tech that comes along with it. I mean I saw a new type of fridge that can connect to your smart phone and you can do certain things through the app. Amazing but to me pointless.

We have slowly been killing our own planet, despite many many many warnings from scientists proving how our actions and technology are changing the state of the world. Is this what was left behind for us to protect and this is how we go about it.

The Year 2020

January the 1st 2020 – the start of a year full of promise, optimism, and change. I can agree with Change and optimism, however promise was never there, it was always a fat lie, the old man in the chambers of commerce sitting in Parliament making nonsensical connotations of fake promises to help the needy and poor. Isn’t that the case all over our continent?

Sure! I personally started 2020 with huge optimistic ideas for my business and growth of the business and growth of my staff to better themselves and their families.

Little did we know what was planned for us, no prediction from Experts or politicians, neither from Scientists nor even the ever so loud conspiracy theorists.

I read an article that WHO director general fired his first warning shot towards the end of January 2020, and repeatedly throughout February 2020 and continued to do so, with no heed to his warning from any country advised to act and act quickly.

“I call upon the international community to take this message seriously and use the window of opportunity to respond while we have time to respond.”

— Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus, director-general, WHO.

The quote above from a website called Devex showing the proof of WHO warning the world, but it seems as if those warnings fell onto deaf ears, or again it was because of world economic gain for certain organisations.

The Restart

The announcement of local containment, testing, the SANDF and Law Enforcement doing their part in making sure adherence is met by the public and the curfew was respected. I think their most difficult times would have been in the locations and high-density areas. I also do not blame the residents of those areas, I mean honest some cant even be more than a meter apart in spacious area, so difficult for everyone. The silver lining was a lot of lives were saved.

I suppose you could question a lot about our government and media at the time, and questions arising of mistrust, corruption, mis information, an ungeared and far from ready medical sector, testing kits becoming more and more scarce, the prices of PPR soaring sky high making it all unfordable to your normal working citizen wanting to earn an Honest Living and had to purchase these products to be able work and earn and feed their families.

Another financial error by the current government. If for arguments sake, that special cabinet for the pandemic knew months ago but only started the prep when it made economic sense for the sake of profiteering from the situation they already knew as coming, the early warnings could have come a lot sooner and preparations should have been made prior to the panic rush, creating shortages and allowing price gauging.

My Theory again, our Government had some sort of benefit gain in that as well. The management of the shutdown by all the resources deployed was an absolute shamble with no control at all in social distancing or the correct measures to check and test and contact trace individuals.

The locations are truly overcrowded, with at least four to 6 people minimum sharing a 3 x 3 room. Ablution is terrible and we cannot even talk about social distancing as it is impossible to even exist in that environment. Again, in my eyes and my views a Failure from poor planning by the MEC of Gauteng and its relevant departments. 

I did not want to pay my team part Salary due their family’s and family responsibility. Was brave and lucky, enough to follow through on this and blessed enough to make a living for everyone during this time, and as a SME, I can proudly say I took Zero assistance from any relief fund supposedly provided.

I survived Thank you Almighty. “

I can`t say the same for a lot of people that have my most sincere empathy towards them, and I hope they can find a way to get back on their feet.

I remember the one day being asked a favour to accompany my friend with licences and permits don’t worry, he asked me to drive a total of 250kms from one side of Gauteng to another, form warehouse to warehouse only find 100 other brokers at each different location all waiting for promised product which was non-existent. What really confused me to this day is that who in their right mind and for what purpose would they send messages and locations to people claiming they buy products and never has any product, and what are they trying to achieve my seeing all these people to know who they are. Serves a purpose – I do not think so. Highly suspicious – Definitely. 

Life Returns Slowly

I Now move on the Real side of my life, my Children. Our exceptional Department of Education feels that its must be the first in the world to win the race to send our Future generation back to school as early as possible. My personal feeling is this should be a huge NO, NO, NO. Our Children are not guinea pigs to be trialled on for the government to utilise the School Data of how many children will and can be infected, who is asymptomatic and who is not. This is a clinical trial to me personally in my view.

Firstly, if it fails and it is a no recall or the unfortunate parents would have to face fatality, who is responsible the School, the government, or the Parents? Secondly if it fails and kids will then inevitably go back home again, the waste of vital funds for PPE for schools now will be null and void. Parents should really consider and voice this.

Yes, I understand the parents and children that are not as fortunate as others, however I still feel the life of the child in question should be more important at this time.

Have you Thought

I will now move on to the lapse in memory for the majority of the medical industry, have we and them, all forgotten that the world suffer more diseases that have been going on and will continue to go whilst COVID 19 has come into our lives. I speak from experience, I had a minor health issue recently, however only to be told that what could have been major to me was not very important to the specialist physicians, and I was clearly told that unfortunately your test results will be put the back of the que due to COVID – 19. In England I have heard of personal stores of relatives suffering from terminal illnesses and getting the worst possible treatment and service and pure negligence of malpractice. A Covid Patient Being Admitted in a ward with terminally ill and highly vulnerable patients. Even a so-called 1st world country struggling to meet the demands of the Pandemic.

This Pandemic has huge propaganda attached to it clearly all over, the lack of PPE reserved for Medicals and frontline workers, WHO being the irresponsible organisation even though they fully knew a lot earlier than the rest. My Theory the world needed a reboot, and this is how it was decided for it to be done, through all the World Leaders. The Economy of the world is now back to where companies can make a goof profit margin again, which was not the case before the Pandemic, for the entire world from Manufacturing to Retail.

Technology had got to its Limit. The Likes of Apple, Samsung and Hauwei came out with some amazing products however rushed it in terms of release, everything was to fast the other companies tried hard to keep up and even tech was at a verge of collapse, or more like implode on itself. I could not see it any other way.


Comparing the COVID-19 Coronavirus to 7 Other Infectious Diseases

Current cases (29 July 2020): Infected: 460K, Recovered: 287K, Current death toll (same date): 7 257

  1. The seasonal flu/Influenza, Yearly cases: approx. 3 to 5 million, Yearly death toll: approx. 290,000 to 650,000

Source: WHO

      2. SARS, Total reported cases: 8,098, Death toll: 774, – Source: CDC

        3. MERS, Total reported cases: 2,494 , Death toll: 858 – Source: WHO

        4. HIV/AIDS, People living with HIV (end of 2018): 32.7 million–44.0 million, Death toll (2019): 570 000–1.1 millionSource: UNAIDS

        5. Ebola, Cases (Aug 2018- Nov 2019): 3,296, Deaths (Aug 2018- Nov 2019): 2,196Source: CDC

        6. Meningitis, Yearly cases: approx. 1.5 million, Yearly death toll: approx. 170,000Sources: CDC/COMO Meningitis

        7. Malaria, Cases (2018): 228 million, Deaths (2018): 405, 000Source: WHO

As a society we should be wary and mindful that the fear of COVID-19 is stopping patients with these types of diseases / illnesses from going to their medical practitioner so in essence Fear of Covid is likely to kill them by not attended their appointments. Which allows the report to state cause death is Covid-19.


I wish this story could be positive and more exciting, however I always take positives away from being surrounded by negativity, such as the Unity Shown by many nations the solidarity, the humanity from people of who have achieved and have been capable of giving back to poor and helpless people.

Charity organisations and NGOS, non-profit organisations, as well as businesses like SMEs pledging to help in whatever aspect possible.

Celebrity’s releasing music under social distancing rules, religions making sacrifices knowing their creator will understand and forgive them (The Mercy of the creator.)

The rise of young people showing they can continue to fight for a better world. All this being done following strict social distancing rules. A silver lining, I suppose. The education of a more hygienic world, with more hygienic people doing more to keep our world alive and give our youth a better future.

I would love to see how we turn out!!!

Terrible twos – My toddler

So welcome back. I feel like I needed to write on this topic because with my first two kids I never experienced this stage! So here I am opening up on the struggle i have been going through for the past few months of late since lockdown and Covid has started.

Terrible twos, what are they?

Well from what I have read on its basically a normal (I laugh when I read normal because I feel like its the craziest and most patience testing time I have had to endure in all the years with all my kids combined, normal yeah right, abnormal for me lol) developmental phase experienced by young children that comes along with tantrums, excessive whining and crying, defiant behavior, and lots of frustration. It begins anywhere from 18 months to 3 years old and, despite what the name implies, can last well into the third year of life. ( Please send help lol!)

So in the times we are living in it seems a whole lot harder to be able to deal with this better. When i’m cooped up the whole day in the house attempting to keep everyone happy and tummies fed, school work up to date and work up to date and all I really want is 5 min alone. To either cook, exercise, shower or at the least have a cup of tea. I find it harder day by day because there is no real way out of it these “terrible two’s” (agree or disagree?) because we as adults are frustrated during this pandemic so I can only imagine what my little guy is also going through, so the tantrums and frustrations are higher too for him. There is no more car rides to pick up the siblings from school, walking in the shops buying sweeties or even going out to a park for a afternoon of fresh air and new experiences.

I do although find myself very lucky to have my two big kids who have found their independence and gosh they are my little life savers at the worst of my day, they step up and can entertain their younger brother up until a certain extent till he becomes frustrated and cries and cries and whines about these small things. They even ask me, “Mummy why does he cry for nothing?”, oh darlings if only I knew. We all know when he doesn’t get what he wants we all better run for cover and cover our ears lol. I also on the other hand blessed to be able to have a wonderful lady who works for me who cares as much for my kids as for me too. She swoops in when she sees I am over whelmed, lets me sleep in for an extra hour, helps me cook when I am out working and her personality is so much like a mother that I feel like even though my mom is not around in the country she is really someone who I can rely on to look out for me, my kids and my home, and I really couldn’t ask for anything more.

So yes the trial of this age with my smally has brought me some good though, through the frustrations and irritating moments that are quite a lot currently. It has actually made me a lot more patient, and I surprise myself as I actually became more patient than I thought I could have, weird because I realized the more I got my emotions built up the more I tended to push myself away from my kids when they really needed me. When he starts up, I just got to breath and breath in deep within my soul shoo, and I just remind myself that he is trying his best also to express his feelings, or spend his energy when he doesn’t know quite what to do with it yet. We have good days and bad but yes he is my special guy, and he does drive me crazy but suppose this crazy will be the normal crazy for the rest of the year, hopefully if anything God will bless us to get to some kind of normality back soon or maybe we have this time to reflect and change what we actually thought was real life but in fact was a world we were all lost in walking with blinders but now are finally getting to see the world for its true beauty, appreciate family and friends and have better interactions with people in general.

If you have any tips or tricks that worked for you, please comment below.

Peace and love.

Marriage advice – Part 1

Whether your situation is either, you have been together for years and take the decision then to get married or you are engaged for a year and after this then wait to get married, or you either moved in with each other to get to know each other and then take this big decision. Uno there are many ways around the marriage topic. Heck it could have even been arranged and if you get the opportunity to talk, talk!

One thing I will always advise people I know who are in the stages of getting married or are even with their partner already, who ask for my advice is honesty. I cannot express how much emphasis couples need to put into this. Guys you are going to spend the rest of your life with this person so try and avoid the lies and the bad habits and just be open before you make this commitment. If you feel you cannot deal with the things going forward then do not get married, simple. Marriage is more working on that relationship consistently and always talking than just you sitting around putting your hands up and saying, “Well I told him/her once about the problem and they don’t listen or understand so that’s it, divorce”. Do not think you are going in the marriage to change them, because you would not like to be changed too. You accept each other whole heartedly, because everyone has faults and flaws.

Learn to share everyday with each other, nothing is too small or unimportant to talk about.

I think if your old enough or actually mature enough to think you are ready to marry, be ready for a road filled with obstacles because marriage is not going to be rosy all the time. Yes, all couples quarrel, it does not mean that because you quarrel, and I mean quarrel does not fight constantly over major issues like say finances, debt or other major issues similar to this (Then perhaps you need to find a better solution out of it, but together) that the whole relationship is a waste, no grow up. Uno when I got married, we had nothing, we used to sit on the floor of my parent’s cottage on garden chair cushions for a couch and had a small box tv, my bed set from my parents’ home and literally anything else we could get from them, lol (you might say shame or feel sad but when I look back on it man we had some amazing memories that we shared and things we overcame as a couple because we were always open about everything, we never let small issues grow into bigger issues, never went to bed angry. We didn’t have enough to start a life as society would put it now, but we were happy because we saw each other, he saw me, and I saw him.

Wealth can come and go but the love and respect you hold as a couple Is what will really get you through the tough times. But if you are quarrelling over petty things like leaving the clothes on the floor, not picking up after yourself, playing PlayStation, etc. These are things that EVERYONE is going through, normal married life! Unfortunately, I still pick up clothes ten years later, I have given up hope and that is something I laugh about with my other married friends, all normal married couple behaviour, you’re not alone in the struggle its real! 😊.

So, if you have had a bad past, or like to take one day of the month to go out for a meal with friends or you like to go fishing once a year whatever it may be. You need to have discussed or be discussing things to avoid conflict in the marriage. Look I am no marriage counsellor, but I have been happily married for the past 10 years to the love of my life, who I married after 4 months of knowing each other. Crazy whirlwind romance. The thing I admire about my husband is that we have always been able to be open to each other about what happened in our past lives or what we like to indulge in our current lives that where their before marriage. Example: He told me he goes on fishing trips once a year with his friends. So, I went into the marriage knowing and accepting this and we do not fight about it when the time arrives, everyone needs space sometimes it is a natural feeling. Heck it gives me the time I need to also just relax and have space too. You learn that when you have those little breaks away from one another it actually allows the love to grow because you may end up hating the small irritating habits, but you miss the cuddles and kisses at night before bed, or the morning coffee when you talk before work.

My last advice is marriage is love, if you do not love that person enough when you go through hard times then how can you then appreciate the love when you are going through good times? Marriage is sacrifice from both parties, so learn to talk, really talk. This is a forever bond so keep it strong and mend it if it seems a little cracked. Grow together, learn together, and laugh together. But most of all love together, couples are unbreakable when you really see and appreciate the person behind the face.

Thanks for reading – Part 2 out soon.

Gender based violence. Anonymous submission.

We have recieved a submission from one of our followers who is interested to share theire thoughts on this topic anonymously. Please note that this has been shared privately with the blog and we are happy share the thoughts of this topic with our readers. No hateful comments or abuse will be allowed as comments. This blog is meant to be a safe place where many stories and thoughts can be shared with our readers and allow voices to be heard. If you would like to submit please email us at submissions@momscaping.co.za . Stories will be revised and if it is relevant to the blog and our readers we will accept it for publishing.



I would like to first touch slightly on an Islamic viewpoint as I have researched certain topics surrounding this abuse topic. I am of Muslim faith in case you would be interested to know . The one thing that i grew up seeing was the Muslim communities who want to neglect the fact that Islamically even in our Shariah law, Islam forbids us to treat another human being in such a manner. Various communities worldwide have created a stigma of divorce, Islam does not stigmatise divorce. They have created this unrealistic idea that a woman should stay with the man when she is under abuse. WHY? It is not your husband who provided to you in your marriage it is Allah (SWT) and he will continue to provide for the both of you after you part ways. So, if your marriage is so bad and negative should you not just part ways? If it can be done amicably then it is best to part ways than to keep inflicting pain and hardship to one another. In the eyes of the communities the abusers are normally seen as the most kind, the most giving but in the home but they bring fear and are despised from the wife, family members and even the children for the hurt that they bring. Dont be hypocrite. Take your faith and follow it to the best that you can do. We will only answer to one person at the end of this life test.

Allah says in the Quran: “Do not hold onto your wives only to cause them more harm.” And if this is your Ni’ah (intention), you are not doing this Dhulm (oppression) to your wife, you are doing it to yourself.

But please do not think I am targeting only the Muslim communities this as this happens in lots of other religious homes and cultures. But, I do not speak on other religious items that I do not have knowledge on.

Lately on the news there seems to have been spread that there is a spike in gender-based violence since the lockdown has been lifted in South Africa and the allowance of alcohol has been brought back into sale. A hot topic on the news channels of late I must say. The President , Mr Ramaphosa has expressed his distaste towards this vile behaviour. It has aggravated the being inside of me. So, this is also why I decided to share this article with momscaping to share my thoughts. You do not know me, but you may know the ladies who are going through these things, suffering in silence, or trying to get help and not being heard.

We know there are two types of abuse that many women suffer with around the world with, not only in South Africa. It is Physical and Emotional abuse. In the Arabic terminology emotional abuse is called Tukabbih, it is when a man makes his wife feel ugly and negative about herself and demeans her in a nasty manner. Even if you do not physically hit a woman this emotional abuse is also a hard hitter and it is also probably the most common type of abuse currently.

So to the many woman out there, know you are stronger than any person who has caused you the pain of abuse, you have endured this for how many a long time that you may have, this is strength so use this fear to build up your insecurities and independance to get the help you need and get out if nothing changes, this is after you have taken the steps first to sort the issue out internally first. Do not let fear take the joy out of your life. If your partner cannot change then the sad reality is that they will never change, unfortunately these stats are quite low. Belive in yourself and know you are capable of more and feel at peace knowing you are safer.

Another Interesting fact that most cases are caused by alcohol usage in South Africa and possibly worldwide and seemingly during the ban of alcohol sales there seemed to be a drop in severity of the reported cases of domestic violence cases reported in South Africa during level 5 and 4. Although Sober partners still could be abusive and controlling, they may be less inclined to turn to violence and could have stuck to emotional abuse instead. What are your thoughts?

Did you know? Gender-based violence is an inequality to mainly the female gender and it continues to be one of the most notable human rights violations within all societies around the world. I would also like to mention that both women and men experience gender-based violence but most victims are women and girls in their highest numbers.


Facts and figures from UN WOMEN.

Various forms of violence

  • It is estimated that 35 per cent of women worldwide have experienced either physical and/or sexual intimate partner violence or sexual violence by a non-partner (not including sexual harassment) at some point in their lives. However, some national studies show that up to 70 per cent of women have experienced physical and/or sexual violence from an intimate partner in their lifetime. Evidence shows that women who have experienced physical or sexual intimate partner violence report higher rates of depression, having an abortion and acquiring HIV, compared to women who have not [1].
  • Similar to data from other regions, in all four countries of a multi-country study from the Middle East and North Africa, men who witnessed their fathers using violence against their mothers, and men who experienced some form of violence at home as children, were significantly more likely to report perpetrating intimate partner violence in their adult relationships. For example, in Lebanon the likelihood of perpetrating physical violence was more than three times higher among men who had witnessed their fathers beating their mothers during childhood than those who did not [2].

TO READ MORE CLICK https://www.unwomen.org/en/what-we-do/ending-violence-against-women/facts-and-figures


People to contact if you or someone you know is experiencing this–

The Gender-Based Violence Command Centre (GBVCC) – operates under The Department of Social Development. The Centre operates a National, 24hr/7days-a-week Call Centre facility. The facility employs social workers who are responsible for call-taking and call referrals. The Centre operates an Emergency Line number – 0800 428 428. This is supported by a USSD, “please call me” facility: *120*7867#. A Skype Line ‘Helpme GBV’ for members of the deaf community also exists. (Add ‘Helpme GBV’ to your Skype contacts). An SMS Based Line 31531 for persons with disabilities (SMS ‘help’ to 31531) also exists. The Centre is able to refer calls directly to SAPS (10111) and field Social Workers who respond to victims of GBV.

Stop Women Abuse – 0800 150 150
Toll-free Legal Aid Advice Line – 0800 110 110 for free legal aid if you who cannot afford one.

SAPS Emergency Services10111

Easy D.I.Y Facemasks

With more than enough time on my hands I want to share a few face masks that you can make at home and that are affordable. You probably have most of the ingredients in your pantry too! So when you feel like a bit of extra pampering along with your Netflix or relaxation time. Try one out and let me know how it is for you.

Ingredients listed below in the masks:

Tumeric – helps reduce acne and any resulting scars. The anti-inflammatory qualities can target your pores and calm the skin.

Plain Yoghurt – Adds moisture and brightens skin. It also fights acne.

Raw Honey – Speeds up skin cells healing process and helps fight acne as it helps balance bacteria on the skin.

Oats – contains avenanthramides, antioxidant and anti-inflammatory compounds that soothe itchy, dry and irritated skin.

Gram Flour – helps gently exfoliate flaky skin and dead cells on skin. (Find this at most spice shops.)

Rose water – it has anti-inflammatory properties that can help reduce the redness of irritated skin, get rid of acne, dermatitis and eczema. It is a great cleanser and aids in removing oil and dirt accumulated in clogged pores. (Find this at most spice shops.)

Lemon Juice – is a great antioxidant. It naturally contains vitamin C, an antioxidant that may help reduce skin damage and premature aging.

Milk powder – acts as a great cleanser. The lactic acid in it lightens and smoothens skin. It gives the new skin formation a boost.


honey and oatmeal
Oatmeal mask

Mix up all the ingredients in a bowl, smooth a thin layer over clean skin, and leave it on for about 10 minutes. Rinse off.

Beauty mode mask

Mix up all the ingredients in a bowl, add one layer over skin, and leave it on for about 10 minutes or till starts to dry. Rinse off. Then use a facewash and continue to moisturise there after. This is my weekly and favourite mask!

Yoghurt and Tumeric mask
  • 1 teaspoon turmeric powder
  • 2 tablespoons plain yogurt.

Mix up then add to your face leave for 15 minutes. Make sure to not just use tumeric on its own as it has the tendancy to stain the skin to a wierd jaunduce looking color! Rinse and then continue with usual face wash and moisturize routine.

Lemon and Honey mask
  • 1/2 Juice of a lemon
  • 1 tablespoon honey

Mix up then add to your face leave for 15 minutes. Rinse with warm water. Continue with face wash and moisturizer.

Milk powder mask
  • 1/4 cup milk powder

Mix up with enough water to form a thick paste, then add to your face till dry. Rinse with warm water. Continue with face wash and moisturizer.

If you try any of these masks. Tag us @mom_scaping ,I would love to hear from you.

Thoughts on turning 30

I am turning the big 3-0 next month and so far, I have ticked the boxes of marriage and kids the socieltel boxes of “life”. I feel like turning 30 is a scary thing because your no more in that young carefree 20’s zone. But then I remind myself that the older I get, I am getting to know my own impulses.

When my mind is going at 643256 km/hr and realize gosh you just need to let things go, life is too short, stop worrying about things that are also not that important. Or if I get teary eyed because I dropped something on the kitchen floor for the 3rd time that day, it is really because of something I probably ended up holding in from another day that just wants to be let free (I actually need to learn to just cry sometimes, better in than out!). Or when I tell myself listen, you are not going to eat that whole packet of crisps, then that kitkat and binge a Netflix series till 1am because your kids will be awake in the next 6 hours, and well we all know what happens next! Lol. Then we complain we never get enough sleep. Lol.

I do feel like I have learnt to dance to my own tune and I know what makes me happy and what triggers my emotions. I enjoy my own company if you would put it like that. Which for me is comforting because it really means I have learned to get to know me, the real me. I am not soul searching and I already know what certain aspects I would like to work on more going forward in life. I have learnt to take my mistakes and apologize for them, we are old enough to be able to say sorry if we are in the wrong, aren’t we? I have learned to stop being so critical of myself and others, uno not everyones life is black and white. We are all just trying to make it!

My friends are my soul group. If you have been blessed to have had the same friends for the past few years as I have then you are no more friends but more family I feel. Look, there will always be new people who come in and out of your life who will always keep a space in your heart for many reasons, but these certain friends will know you inside and out if you have managed to surpass the 20’s stage of up’s and down’s. The late nights, natural no make up looks, Pj visits sitting in the car talking, the fights, the marriages, the children. All these create stronger bonds between friends who have experienced these things together. Appreciate it.

But the best thing I feel the most happiest about turning 30 is that I really have become unapologetic in a sense where I do not feel the pressure to be a certain look, or have my body look a certain way either. I live my life to my own path, and I will not tolerate shit. I admire everyone who is on that road and who might already be there. Do not fall victim to the ideas of society and live your life towards a certain trajectory. Live your truth, because you are the one who controls it.

To that once seemingly daunting number 30, bring it on!

Hello, I am mom

I am the mom who sleeps but never really sleeps.

I am a mom who knows what new cartoon is out but not what new movies are out.

I am the mom who listens to rap music and enjoys dancing with my kids in my living room.

I am the mom who tries to feed her children organic and whole foods as much as possible but I still will hold a pre packed meal or a fast food delivery dear to my heart to save my mind.

I am the mom who flies through parenting by the tip of her fingers (just doing it as it comes), I plan and I even own a calendar but I tend to forget some things sometimes.

I am the mom who tries to be crafty, but not for all the things. (Some of you mom’s take the crown!)

I am the mom who tells my kids to play outside, eat mud and be dirty.

I am the mom who throws small, intimate birthday parties at home. (because my circle is small.)

I am the mom who keeps an endless pile of laundry, I promise to get to it though! (Soon, maybe tommorow lol.)

I am the mom who sneaks off to the bathroom and sometimes hides in my car just so I can catch 5 minutes to gather my thoughts. (This also happens when I take out my favourite chocolate too!)

I am the mom who will sit up at night and cry. Sometimes we all just need a good cry.

I am the mom who eats the crust of her kids sandwiches, but makes sure they eat their vegetables.

I am the mom who has to be disciplining yet gentle too.

I am the mom who loves to sit on pinterest and laugh at parenting memes,

I am the mom who sometimes forgets that I actually have a life beyond my home and that is ok.

I am the mom who forgets to buy bread because I get distracted at the grocery store.

I am the mom who loves “moms’ night out” even if it has become just a video call.

I am the mom who will always try to be the best I can be. I have flaws, I make mistakes but I will not forget that these things are what make be a mom.

I am a mom who knows all moms, have a mom who they also love and cherish.

Happy Mothers Day!


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DUAS TO READ AND LEARN

As we entered into Ramadan 2020 I wanted to share a post that can help all of us learn a few short duas that will help us increase our blessings in this beautiful month. Like and share with your friends and family and remember me and everyone in your duas. Have a blessed ramadan 2020!

PS: THERE IS A DOWNLOADABLE VERSION AVAILABLE TO SHARE TOO!!


1. Dua That Guarantees You Forgiveness

(Sahih Al-Bukhari) Prophet Muhammad SAW (PBUH) said: “Whoever gets up at night and says:

La ilaha ‘illa Allaahu, wahdahu la shareeka lahul mulku, wa lahul hamdu, wa huwa ala kulli shayin qadeer. Subhana allaahi, wal hamdu lillaahi, wa la illaaha ila Allaah, wa Allaahu akbar, waLa hawla wa la quwwata illa billaah.

There is none worthy of worship in truth except Allah Alone, He has no partners, He has the Dominion and for Him is all praise, and He is capable of all things, praise is for Him, and Far is Allah from imperfection, and There is none worthy of worship in truth except Allah, and Allah is the Greatest, there is no capability nor is there any power except with Allah.

“Then he says: Allaahumma aghfirlee. O Allaah forgive me!

Or he supplicates and his supplication is answered, and if he makes Wudhu and prays, then his prayer is accepted.


2. Dua That Wipes Away Sins.

(Sahih Al-Bukhari, Muslim, At-Tirmidhi) Prophet Muhammad SAW (PBUH) said: “Whoever says:

Subhana allaahi, wa bihamdih.

How far from imperfections Allah is, and I praise Him.

A hundred times during the day, his sins are wiped away, even if they are like the foam of the sea.”


3. Phrases That Are Heavier On The Scales Than An Entire Morning Of Recitation.

(Sahih Muslim) Prophet Muhammad SAW (PBUH) said: “I recited four words three times after I had left you. If these are to be weighed against all you have recited since morning, these will be heavier.” These are:

Subhan-Allahi wa bihamdihi, ‘adada khalqihi, wa rida nafsihi, wa zinatah ‘arshihi, wa midada kalimatihi.

Allah is free from imperfection and I begin with His praise, as many times as the number of His creatures, in accordance with His Good Pleasure, equal to the weight of His Throne and equal to the ink that may be used in recording the words (for His Praise)


4. Dua To Stay On The Right Path.

(Sahih Muslim)

Ya musarrifa-l quloobi sarrif qalbi ala ta’atik.

O, Allah! The One Who turns the hearts, turn my heart towards Your obedience.


5. Dua To Be Saved From Torments Of Grave.

Allahumma inni wa a’udhu bika min adhabil qabri.

O, Allah! Saves us from the torments of the grave.


6. Dua For The Best In The Dunya And Hereafter.

Rabbana atina fid-dunya hasanatan, wa fil’akhirati hasanatan, waqina ‘adhaban-nar.

O, Allah! Our Lord give us all the good of this world, and the good of the hereafter, and Save us from the punishment of the Fire.


7. Dua To Help Pay Off Your Debts.

(Sahih At-Tirmidhi)

Allahum-makfinee bi halaalika ‘an haraamika wa aghninee bifadhlika ‘amman siwaaka.

O, Allah! Suffice me with what You have allowed instead of what You have forbidden, and make me independent of all others besides You.


8. Dua Of The Treasures Of Paradise.

(Sahih Al-Bukhari, At-Tirmidhi) Prophet Muhammad SAW (PBUH) said: “Shall I not tell you of a word which is one of the treasures of Paradise?”

La hawla wa la quwaata illa billah.

There is no power and no strength except with Allah.


9. Dua That Protects You From All Evil.

(Sahih Ibn Majah)

Bismillaahil-lathee laa yadhurru ma’as-mihi shay’un fil-‘ardhi wa laa fis-samaa’i wa Huwas-Samee’ul-‘Aleem.

In the Name of Allah, Who with His Name nothing can cause harm in the earth nor in the heavens, and He is the All-Hearing, the All-Knowing.


10. Sayyidul Istighfar.

(Sahih Al-Bukhari, Sahih Al-Jami, At-Tirmidhi)

Prophet Muhammad SAW (PBUH) said: If somebody recites this invocation (given below) during the day, and if he should die then, he will be from the people of Jannah. And if he recites it in the night, and if he should die on the same day, he will be from the people of Jannah.”

Allahuma anta Rabbi la ilaha illa anta, Khalaqtani wa ana ‘Abduka, wa ana ‘ala ‘ahdika wa wa ‘dika mastata ‘tu, A ‘udhu bika min Sharri ma sana’tu, abu’u Laka bini’matika’alaiya, wa abu’u laka bidhanbi faghfir lee fa innahu la yaghfiru adhdhunuba illa anta.

O, Allah! You are my Lord! None has the right to be worshipped but You. You created me and I am Your slave, and I am faithful to my convenant and my promise as much as I can. I seek refuge with You from all the evil I have done. I acknowledge before You all the blessings You have bestowed upon me, and I confess to You all my sins. So I entreat You to forgive my sins, for nobody can forgive sins except You.


EXTRA ZHIKR:

Subhana Allah (Allah is perfect) 33x, Alhamdulillah (Praise be to Allah)33x, Allahu Akbar (Allah is the Greatest) 34x.

More:

Subhan Allahi Wa Bi Hamdihi (Allah is free from imperfections)

La ilaha illa’llah (None has the right to be worshipped except Allah)

Astagfirullah ( I seek forgiveness from Allah)

La Hawla Wala Quwawta ila Billah ( There is no might nor power except with Allah)

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Jazakallah for your read and your time.


Motherhood and faith

Being a mother in Islam is one of the highest praises a woman status is raised up too. It is a dignified and valued role. The importance of the mother is evident in Islamic teachings. From marriage, to conception and then childbirth and rearing. As a mother in the home it can be quite easy to forget the respect and position, we hold in our homes, as the pillars of strength that hold our households together. We are the glue that holds all the puzzle pieces together, pulling each unit closer when it loosens or tends to move away from the folds. In-between trying to raise our children to be good people and Muslims we are stuck between finding time for ourselves, housework, cooking and our faith too.

Our Prophet S.A.W enjoined goodness to mother’s that we must keep dear to our hearts:

A man came to the Prophet and said, ‘O Messenger of God! Who among the people is the most-worthy of my good companionship? The Prophet said: Your mother. The man said, ‘Then who?’ The Prophet said: Then your mother. The man further asked, ‘Then who?’ The Prophet said: Then your mother. The man asked again, ‘Then who?’ The Prophet said: Then your father. (Bukhari, Muslim)

Islam praises woman so high that we are given the status of fighters in the path of Allah S.W.T when we become pregnant, up until delivery from breastfeeding till we are finished, if we had to die during this time we would be given the status as a Martyr of Islam. Raising virtuous children will be our reward even when we pass away. Alhamdulillah. What positions we hold in Islam, so my dear sisters let us keep our heads up and support each other in the way of our faith.

If one of us falls behind or needs a helping hand. Offer it.

Motherhood entails great difficulty a fact recognized by the Qur’an. Imagine what the mother of Prophet Musa (A) went through when she was told to put her baby in the river, and she was given the re-assurance that her child would be returned to her. Allah asked her to do one of the hardest things imaginable, give her baby away to the unknown. But her Iman (faith) was so strong that she accepted and followed through.

When the baby was picked up by Firawn’s wife he refused to suckle the milk on any foster mother, and it was then suggested by Prophet Musa (A) sister that they try to use her mother. Mother and baby were united by Allah’s promise. (Sura TaHa 37-40, Qasas 7-13) Allah U Akbar (God is great). What strength, what sabr (patience) she had to endure.

Let us all have these qualities in us with our own children, ameen.

We as mothers have outstanding qualities that we forget with our daily life and the chase of the Dhunya (temporal world). I want to remind you as I remind myself too:

The love for our children is unmatched. Our child could be disabled, healthy, troublesome, or obedient but we still overcome these difficulties with love in the end. Whether we shout and punish them when they are misbehaving, this too is a form of love from us as mothers. We are also trying to teach them right from wrong, in the end we always show love and give them comfort after we do. Our children will grow up knowing us as mother’s who bring peace and love to the home. Do children not feel attached to the home because of the mother’s? I think so.

Do not forget that we are the first point of contact to our children when they are born, they are the future of Islam, as what lies in us as mother’s is what we will instil in them as they grow.

As mothers we are hard on ourselves and we forget or do not know by tending to our children we are getting rewarded. Every time we attend to our children we are rewarded or feed our children it is a Sadaqa and we are rewarded for it. Whatever good habits, or good manners and morals that will be performed by our children that we as mothers have passed on to them, we will get rewarded for it. They are our legacies and when we pass away our book of deeds will close, but we will still be able to accrue reward in the form of our pious children who makes dua for us or carry on with the good we had taught them.

So, when you feel like you are struggling with your faith, remember that these actions in themselves give us rewards throughout our daily lives. So, to recap we are still gaining reward and following our religious duties even though we feel we are not doing the best at times. Mother’s in Islam have gone through major trials by handing their faith in The Almighty and we should also do the same with ours. If you struggle remember we all struggle and the best medicine for this is to remember your place as the pillar in the house and the rewards you are gaining by just ‘living’.

Jazakallah for information given from Mufti Aslam. (Zimbabwe).

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